i think i’m gonna go to sleep soon b/c wow my uterus is tiring me the hell out aiight deuces babes
god gave us two hands for a reason
my Dad makes dad jokes but because hes a physics teacher theyre not common dad jokes
"hey dad, whats up?"
"Up is a directional vector with no force"
[almost] finished project!
my dream is to one day make enough money to remake the movie twilight so that everything is exactly the same except edward cullen is played by kanye west and kanye west doesnt have a script and isn’t even aware of what the plot of the movie is, he’s just kanye west reacting to twilight in real time
“your skin is pale white and ice cold”
“bitch I’m black what are you on”
Interviewer: If you are a villain, you need to be intelligent. So I’ve got a riddle to see if you’re up to the task of world domination. [x]
Zoomed out while taking a picture of my Christmas tree
[ CHRISTMAS INTENSIFIES ]
i heard kissing is good for u so how about we both try to stay healthy huh
WHAT A SHAME THE POOR GROOMS BRIDE IS A
wait this is on tv like regular tv all the “motherfuckers” are gonna be cut out oh my god this is going to be so sad
Guy walking his savannah cat in Brooklyn like it’s no big deal. I hope my fascination with the creature communicated to him otherwise.
#bethegetsthisallthetimeI humbly bow to thee.